goodbye

my personal life has taken a trun for the worse. i've been bitchy and easily frustrated and i feel like i've lost myself in my troubles.

i've got to stop pretending that the party is still going on and sober up.

if you can't accompany me then just tell me. 'cos i don't like waiting or assuming things. it's such a simple thing to do really.

if at least you said you're going to accompany me than i wouldn't mind waiting. if you don't say anything and i wait and wait and then finally i assume that you can't go then that would piss me off.

please uh i already have waiting issues with my boyfriend. i certainly don't need to suffer at home too.

talking about the boy, seems you're bored of me too huh.

life's fucked up as of now.

Joss Stone

I AM SO LOVING HER HAIR, MAKES HER LOOK MORE SEXIER! :p

frustrating much

just when i thought i did the right thing by being difficult. by being pissed off when he suddenly texted me again that we can still meet up but after 8pm. by screwing that up and making him lose his mood.

i thought i would feel somewhat satisfied but here i'm feeling rather guilty. and by doing so i have to swallow my pride, yet again, and call him to apologize. that's if he wants to talk to me.

what am i doing wrong. i know i shouldn't be stressing him 'cos he already is stressed enough without me heaping on him more unwanted stress but i'm just clueless right now. usually i have no problem dealing with our minor setbacks.

maybe february isn't my month. not only am i broke, i'm feeling rather broken hearted too.

i need help. the balance that was present in our relationship is now missing.

breaking point

let's face it, both you and i need a break.

you need to get back on your feet and i desperately need some me time.

the constant cancelling of plans is killing me.

the nightly calls aren't enough anymore, words mean nothing now if you can't show me you miss me.

yes, i'm being a bitch right now 'cos i've had enough.

i love you still but this is too much.

i'm reaching my breaking point, please don't push me over the edge again. 'cos if you do i will not want to make the effort to climb back up again knowing that you won't be there physically to help me get back up on my feet.

and fact is, our relationship is going into a downward spiral, again.

stuffing tissue up my nose.

i have not been feeling well for the past few days. is it the flu season again or is it because of the 14 hour shift i worked last week? could be both.

now i'm alone at home doing my finances. since my colleague wanted to book the flight tickets already i had to use my savings to pay for my sister and her bf. thank goodness i havee just enough to cover the cost of the primary flight to and from australia. and after that i'm officially broke.

i can't even buy my monthly groceries and toiletries. let alone my BB Torch. may be next month aye?

next month i have to start saving for my expenses and i have to start from scratch. gosh i really hope i can do it cos there are a lot of things i want to try while i'm in australia and a lot of places i want to visit. and of course the shopping i want to do there.

i really want to go so badly. i'd just eat at home if that's what it takes to save. i'd really scrimp and save up for the next few months if that's what it takes. screw material things for the next few months.

wish me luck

FML #2

my pay this month sucks, so much for always doing train ot. the amount is about the same as when i got my first pay slip. they deducted $150 extra for i don't know what reason. my monthly pay is just enough to cover my expenses and abit extra i can give my family.

i'll end up with no savings this month.

whoever is responsible for our pay this month is a total faggard. spoil my month only.

PARAMORE!

By far the best performance of Decode. :)

Jessie J

She's something fresh on the music scene, been wanting to post her video earlier but i keep forgetting. well enjoy :)

i am excited

my night off was spent making plans with my colleagues about our australia trip. we took about four hours i think, sitting around a coffee table at Starbucks @ Civic calculating funds, deciding our itinerary and setting the date of the trip.

well, the date for the trip is set, for now, as well as the amount to be set aside for flights and hotels. the actual itinerary is still up for discussion 'cos it's not necessary to do it now. there's ample time to discuss our itinerary once we actually get there.

and i suppose until then i'll be dreaming about the 'roos and such.