i overslept and skipped school again today, i'm starting to fall into that neverending cycle all over again. i feel so suffocated and tired all the time. wanting to go to sleep and waking up is becoming like some sort of mission. on top of that, life at home isn't at all fun anymore. i want to move out but i know i will never hear the end of it from mother. i'm always the one to be blamed if my siblings do something wrong, like when my sis has her late nights, they say i'm the one who taught her. is it so difficult for them to remember that i'm mentally unstable?? i wish they'd let me breathe once in awhile.

the only saving grace of coming home after school everyday is because of my cats. i always find solace and peace when i cuddle them or when i talk to them, especially Baby. She seems to know when i'm feeling low. maybe the only other reason that's keeping me from moving out is because i'll be missing my beacon of light at home, my Baby.

i have been mulling things over in my head and been trying to come to a decision, however i have a very strong feeling that i will never hear the end of it either from my parents and my girlfriends.

i can never think that my depression is going to lift anymore, not if i'm going through the same cycle every single, messed up day of my life.