my weekend has been rather tiring, not because i went out or anything. i was tired 'cos i did alot of waiting. the jb trip was cancelled and nobody thought it would be important for me to know. i could have gone down for Fadli's brother's wedding and helped out. mother and her last minutes sometimes kill me.
in the end, sister went out to the zoo with her loverboy. and i went out to meet some people to chill later at night. so basically during the afternoon i wasted away at home trying not to be mad at anyone. i swear i was pissed at everyone, even the cats.
my head's a mess. my thoughts have been going into unnecessary territories lately. my insomnia is making a return trip. i'll fuck myself if the old cycle returns. that shit is too hard for me to handle, not again, not anymore.
and now i feel like arguing with somebody, feel like fucking somebody up, real bad.
maybe i'll make a trip down to RP tomorrow afternoon to meet my girls. that will surely help to take my mind off somethings. i miss my girls, i'll ask Nuruz to tag along if she 's free.
so far my Monday has been pretty mundane, i watched Stomp the Yard twice today. just to kill time, then and old classmate came over, she revealed alot of news about my old schoolmates. what i heard came to no surprise for me, basically almost all the girls in my old class have gone into a downward spiral, some more than others. from what i know their behaviours were no different from when they were in school, and back in the day there was constant backstabbing and bitching going around that i really couldn't be bothered to trust anyone in school 'cos i know one of the unlucky ones they bitch about was me. so tell me, if not wanting to even cross paths with them is wrong.
on a much lighter note, i have a feeling that my parents will give me the green light to travel overseas alone, that is by the end of the year, i have alot of kissing up to do, i really should start being a good girl.
yeah right!
adieu.
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