getting fit

found 3 youtube channels that have been real helpful in helping me shed that 5 extra kilos

TiffanyRotheWorkouts
BeFit
BlogilatesTV

i have thus far shed 2 kilos in the last 3 months. i admit that i have not been very consistent with it. i can manage to do cardio 3 days in a row and not manage to find time to do it the next week. still losing 2 kilos is saying something. my diet has been more healthy and i don't binge anymore when i am feeling frustrated or emotional. instead i jog it off. :)

my goal from now until mid-july is to lose the remaining 3 kilos. Ramadan is next month. Syukur alhamdulillah i get to experience Ramadan again this year. :)

i do not think i will be taking a break from the cardio routine i have going on during the fasting period. one month is too long a break. i think the most perfect time i can do cardio during that period is at night after Terawih on the days i am on my morning shift.

i am so excited about losing weight though some people say i am already petite so there is no need for me to lose any. to each his own i say.

sides' i am still not happy with mother gloating in my face about how lighter and how smaller her tummy is compared to mine. so, my pride is at stake, even if i am just competing with my own mother.

i shall be extremely happy if i get to gloat in her face.

jumbled emotions

i have been sucha wreck since babysis left for Bangkok.

the most epic fail ting i have done thus far is mistaking the CAT shampoo for the usual one i use. i kid you not people. i almost massaged it on my head, thank god i noticed the smell was different. i think i am suffering from withdrawal symptoms. tsk.

anywho, i put a stop to the affair i had going on. it was a mutual thing 'cos things were starting to get dangerous and i figured i had enough excitement for the past few weeks. though it left me wanting more cos he left such an impression on me but i have already started to dis-associate all sexual feelings i have of him. its important that i do this as quickly as possible cos i wouldn't want to ruin the friendship that we always had.

after, everything that has happened between me and him, i realised that i had no right to compete for his sexual attention with his girlfriend. true that it was a convenient affair but still, i shouldn't have let my craving for physical affection get to me. i know it is wrong but truthfully, i do not feel any guilt whatsoever. no regrets either. i think being a Sagittarius is why i am the way i am.

however, i don't go searching for lovers. if its convenient and if we're mutual about it then yes. i guess i am to much of a free spirit nowadays, especially after leaving a bad relationship. i have no intention to commit just yet.

i need to compartmentalize my thoughts and emotions again. only Allah(swt) knows how messed up it is.

Good Day World!

officially alone for the weekend :)

my family will be returning tomorrow night. was supposed to follow them but i didn't want to 'cos i don't know any of my distant relatives in Malacca. I'd rather spend time by myself, doing random things at home.

some plans were made prior to this weekend but some complications came up and my excitement just flew out the window the moment it came up. expecting an old friend to pay a visit tomorrow afternoon but she hasn't replied to my texts yet. I'm hoping my parents will come back very late tomorrow and that babybro's break sesh will be cancelled and that he'll stay in JB as well. 'cos i want to be alone this weekend, its a VERY rare thing to have my whole family out of town and i am loving every moment of it. for once this month I'm not feeling pissed at anything or anyone, disappointed that the plan for this weekend has not been confirmed yet, yes but all in all I'm pretty happy with myself.

i guess that's for today, back to cleaning out my closet. sucha mess in there.

missing my best friend and other stuff :)

it has been a rather mundane start to June. sister is in Bangkok and will be so until June ends, for work. i am so jealous when i found out. and we just returned from Bali the week before. she is one lucky bitch and i miss her so much.

our room just seems so empty, i have no one to talk to late at night when i can't sleep. no one to help me pick out clothes to wear when I'm going out and no one to say that my makeup looks good as well. she is my rock and i am feeling kinda lost w/o her here. however, i am still proud that my baby sister has made it this far in her career. hoping to see her become Manager few years down the road. she is that good in the retail business. i am biased because i am her sister but i don't care.

baby brother is following in her footsteps as well. he has already started working part time w/ CO. though i wished he would at least wait until his major exams are over and done with. mother says that he works too hard and i am concerned that it will affect his studies. he's N levels are right around the corner.

i guess my siblings are made for the retail business. sure they complain about dealing w/ difficult customers but i have seen them at work. who doesn't complain about work? i know i do. after every single shift ends, i will come back home and complain to my cats. :)

anws, when sister comes back home end June, i am planning a night out w/ her and some of our common friends that i am close with. prolly go clubbing but Ramadan is around the corner so i do not think we can make it for ladies night. i have never liked paying cover charges ever since i stopped drinking a few years back. still prefer to enter for free. who wouldn't?

we'll see how. :)

anws. the other stuff is just basically finding out truths i denied for so long. mostly to do with the ex. always known that something was fishy but i chose to not listen to my intuition. and i paid for it. sure the relationship started out great but after the 2nd year it just went downhill. spent the last year feeling lonely despite having a so called bf. oh wells, its a lesson learnt and i hope learn from it and not repeat the same mistakes again. i did find it out from Nana, better than finding it out from anyone else. cried the jerk out of my system 2 nights in a row and now i am feeling WAY better.

happy being single for now, though i feel slightly envious when i see couples walking out on the street. who doesn't right, i mean when you already know how it feels to have a significant other.

i guess this is it for this week's post. :)

Sigma's Paris Palette

i just had to get the palette when Sigma sent me the email. mother thinks my makeup spending is becoming too much but she has been using my other Sigma palettes on the sly so my spending is justified, somehow.

the Paris palette is limited edition which makes it more important for me to get it. :)

enough of the blabbing, swatches coming up. they're not great swatches but hey, i tried. :)

i guess the pictures aren't that great cos i do not have a photography corner set up yet. wonder when that'll happen so worked w/ what i got at the moment.